tarnlad1 blog on Absolute Radio

Gob - Smacked

tarnlad1 — Mon, 05 May 2008 18:54:00 +0100

hello all

not been here for a while, but how things have changed. there are blogs in the Lounge from 4 days ago, have all the good folks gone elsewhere ?

time to go again Seeya's

tarnlad1 — Wed, 12 Sep 2007 11:50:00 +0100

moya brennan glastonbury 24 june

http://www.myspace.com/moyabrennan

make time - not excuse's

good morning VR hope you're well

tarnlad1 — Wed, 12 Sep 2007 11:20:00 +0100

greetings to all my pals on here especially Zeynep - Zeus - Angelofnorth & Britpopgirl love to you all xxx

them

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=877490253

van the MAN

Hiya, and Good Morning, Going Home For Awhile

tarnlad1 — Wed, 20 Jun 2007 06:28:00 +0100

The floods of last weekend, destroyed the kitchens in the restaurant where I was working, my agency offered me another post, pro-tem, but the owner offered me 10 days paid holiday, if I would go back on a permanent basis, gone to Blackrock, see you all on my return. Hope you all keep well, good-luck.

Where do you live?

tarnlad1 — Thu, 14 Jun 2007 09:00:00 +0100

Personally I originate just outside of Dublin (Blackrock) - and I suppose people from London, Paris or L.A. don't mind owning up to where they're from, but imagine living in one of the following?

Shafter (California, USA)
Beaver (Oklahoma, USA)
Shitlingthorpe (Yorkshire, UK)
Bastard (Norway)
Twatt (Orkney, UK)
Arsoli (Lazio, Italy)
Muff (Northern Ireland)
Wankie (Zimbabwe)
Climax (Colorado, USA)
Nobber (Donegal, Ireland)
Lickey End (West Midlands, UK)
Fukum (Yemen)
Lord Berkeley's Knob (Sutherland, Scotland)
Dildo (Newfoundland, Canada)
Turdo (Romania)
Dongo (Congo - Democratic Republic)
Seymen (Turkey)
Dong Rack (Thailand-Cambodia border)
Intercourse (Pennsylvania, USA)
Brown Willy (Cornwall,UK)
Wanks River (Nicaragua)
Wankendorf (Schleswig-Holstein, Germany)
Fuku (Shensi, China)
Beaver Head (Idaho, USA)
Fukui (Honshu, Japan)
Shag Island (Indian Ocean)
Fukue (Honshu, Japan)
Middle Intercourse Island (Australia)
Wankie Colliery (Zimbabwe)
Chinaman's Knob (Australia)
Wet Beaver Creek (Australia)
Tittybong (Australia)
Pis Pis River(Nicaragua)
Dikshit (India)
Wankener (India)
Sexmoan (Luzon, Philippines
Bell End (Worcestershire, UK)

Ever heard of Screaming Orphans?

tarnlad1 — Tue, 12 Jun 2007 11:31:00 +0100

This is Circles, if you fancy a watch.

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=2017879544

hope you liked it.

Just had this Emailed, hope it works

tarnlad1 — Sun, 10 Jun 2007 10:26:00 +0100

Them Live 1960's

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=877490253

Right, Dog Walking Duty (for a friend)

tarnlad1 — Sat, 09 Jun 2007 10:28:00 +0100

Seemingly the Queen sent the following message to the citizens of the United States:

Following your failure to elect a candidate as President to govern yourselves and, by extension, the free world, we hereby give notice of the revocation
of your independence.

Her sovereign majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume a monarch's duties over all states, commonwealths and other territories. To aid transition to a British Crown Dependency, please comply with the following acts:

1.Look up "revoke" in a dictionary.

2.Learn at least the first four lines of :-

"God Save The Queen."

3.Start referring to soccer as football.

Tax collectors from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all revenues due (back dated to 1776).

Thank you for your co-operation and have a nice day.

Sincerely,

Elizabeth II.

1 Hour Cleaners

tarnlad1 — Sat, 09 Jun 2007 09:51:00 +0100

Monica at the cleaners :

Monica Lewinski walks into the dry cleaners and says to the assistant "Excuse me, but could you clean this dress for me?"

The assistant. who is a little hard of hearing, says "Come again?"

Monica replies "No, this time its mustard."

Well Thanks For Sympathy

tarnlad1 — Mon, 04 Jun 2007 09:19:00 +0100

When I had to work had some nice comments, but today is Monday and I'm NOT working, I've a pocket full of money thanks to Brazil & Dettorie, the only problem I have is not knowing where I'm going to go and enjoy my day.

On Human Bondage

tarnlad1 — Sun, 03 Jun 2007 09:50:00 +0100

A mother cleaning in her son's room finds a pile of S&M magazines stashed under the bed.

Upset, she immediately runs downstairs and shows some of the magazines to her husband.

"Well?" his wife asks. "What do you think we should do?"

"I'm not sure," the father replies. "But we certainly shouldn't spank him."

For Geordies Who Like Irish Jokes

tarnlad1 — Fri, 01 Jun 2007 12:52:00 +0100

New Ferrari pit crew

The Ferrari Formula 1 team fired their entire pit crew yesterday.The announcement followed Ferrari's decision to take advantage of the UK government's youth opportunity scheme and employ young people
from Tyneside.

The decision to hire them was brought about after a recent documentary on how unemployed youths from Tyneside were able to remove a set of wheels in less than 6 seconds without proper equipment, whereas Ferrari's existing crew can only do it in 8 seconds with millions of euros worth of high-tech equipment.

Prime Minister Tony Blair went on record as saying this was a bold move by Ferrari management which demonstrated the international recognition of the UK under New Labour.

As most races are won and lost in the pits, Ferrari now have the advantage over every other team. However, Ferrari may have got more than they bargained for. At the crews first practice session the Tyneside pit crew successfully changed the tyres
in under 6 seconds, but within 60 seconds they had resprayed, re-badged and sold the vehicle to the Mclaren team for :-

8 cases of Stella; a kilo of grass, and some photos of Coulthard's bird in the shower.

goto go in 15mins, I'll leave this for you

tarnlad1 — Thu, 31 May 2007 13:45:00 +0100

A CAT dies and goes to heaven. At the Pearly Gates, he's met by God who announces that, as a reward for virtue, he can have anything he wants.

The cat says he's lived with a poor family and always slept on the floor. At once, a downy pillow appears and the cat makes himself comfortable.

A few days later, six mice are killed in an accident. God makes them the same generous offer.

The mice say they've spent all their lives on the run from cats, dogs and women with brooms and
would like to run no more. Immediately each is fitted with a tiny pair of roller skates.

A week later, God decides to see how the cat's getting on. "Never been so happy in my life," says
the cat, stirring on his pillow, "and those meals on wheels you're sending round are absolutely
delicious"

Disappointed

tarnlad1 — Sun, 27 May 2007 09:03:00 +0100

This won't let me add several artist's to my favourite music listing, has it happened to anyone else?