Blog
(201 views) Just a few words tonight! 4 hours ago I started a Word doc & realise I must try & keep it short enough for people to read before falling asleep or missing loads of other postings! Those that want the long version can ask!
Since March, I put off my 1st joint of the day until sunset. When they put the clocks forward it was more difficult but I was down to 3 spliffs/day & 2 or 3 large roll up fags.
Hoping my kids would pay me a visit, I decided that June should be smoke free & it was (except for a few after a row with the neighbour!)
David (21 in September) came for 2 weeks in UK, most with my brother to improve his English & he only came to see me for 1 day brought by my brother with 2 of my nephews. He did it on purpose because I hadn’t spoken with my brother for nearly 10 years! (You understand how including explanations turn this into a novel?)
It was a very emotional experience, I would’ve liked more than 24 hours with him but he wanted to let me know he had forgiven me for not being the father he wanted. He didn’t want to be here when his older sister Sandra (26 last July) & Dimitri, my grandson, 5 on 29th August came to see me from 4th August, going home on the 12th spending 1 night at my brother’s & going to see my father the next day & back here, about 400 miles round trip!
They both phoned Rebecca (15 last January, now 1m 86/6’2”!) She was spending a little time on the phone when I called but now she wants to talk more with me! Nathan was 14 last April is only 1m 74/5’9” & just having his voice drop! He still finds it difficult to talk for long!
This is already too long having not said all I want to! Perhaps I wont wait another 6 months to post a blog!
Love Hugs & Blessings to all of you
Malcolm X
(211 views) Well yesterday (Monday 2nd March) I went to Open Road who have been counselling me about giving up weed, in Basildon (£17 each way by taxi) to have my 1st session of aqua puncture. It’s not a quick fix & I wanted to smoke before I got out but managed to resist about 4 hours until 7pm when I had an ordinary roll up then at 9 & 11pm I had a spliff before meds helped me get to sleep shortly after midnight.
Although I wanted to smoke after breakfast, I took 2 Tramadol & stayed under the duvet until 2pm! Putting of making a cuppa until 3:30, it was nearly 4pm before my 1st roll up today. If I can limit myself to 3, then 2 spliffs/day by the end of March with 2 or 3 roll ups, there will come a moment when I have to stop! Even if it means taking more NHS pills for a while, it’ll save me money & once I have stopped for more than a month, I hope it’ll be for good. Getting out of prescription addiction is something I intend to approach, angry that I have been prescribed Temazepam & Diazepam for 7 years, that my osteoarthritis was just treated with 8 paracetamol & 8 ibuprofen/day, it’s hardly surprising that I had serious gastric problems a year ago!
Finally they’ve agreed that I get the high rate mobility DLA, an extra £30/week. If I succeed in giving up smoking, I should be able to live modestly paying my ex 150 euros/month next year & visit the kids, possibly staying for a month & seeing them twice in a row in summer or a quick return in summer & perhaps early December or January.
Although it’s going to cost me about £650 more to pay 12 months this year than 10 months last year due to the drop in value of the £, I’ll be getting a £386 refund from Enfield Council who have had £3.05/week deducted from my benefits about 2 ½ years too long!
Having bought myself some swim ware I can go to the disabled swimming club any Sunday 3 – 4:30 for only £10/year. Also bought a new £5 kettle 2 belts £4 each & 2 packs of 7 socks £4 1 pack, 2nd pack ½ price £2! Oh, & a doormat £4! Feels like I’ve bought myself 5 years Christmas presents!
Having got my credit card debts down to £2,500 on low rate balance transfers that leaves £7,000 available to someone who’s annual income is about the same as credit cards give me & my bank allow me £1,000 overdraft, it’s hardly surprising that people spend what they can then go bankrupt!
Love & blessings all!
Malcolm X
(115 views) Were you sitting comfortably? Seriously, I'm trying to slowly give up all my smoking! Already made a lot of progress since I’ve been on tramadol! It makes me lethargic & calms the craving. Perhaps I’ll use prescribed drugs for free & have more money to pay to visit my kids. It might even be possible to spend a month in the SW France & see them 2 consecutive visits!
For a while, I’ve determined not to have a spliff before 2pm & only once had 1 12ish after an early rise having only had 8 over a lazy w/end! Staying under the duvet helped & Nicola is on holiday which also helps!
All prayers appreciated!
Rachel tells me she plans on going to New Zealand in April & David has just moved in to his own flat. Both wanted money! Hopefully the euro will go quickly down to 1.40 where it was when I paid 10 months child care. In May I should pay 1,720 (12*146euros/month)
David plans coming to UK in August but will probably spend more time with my brother (who has a 3 bed house in Lichfield & his kids have left home) than with me!
Sandra is less certain that the marriage will be next year now!
So I’ve got through the worst of winter even if the cold snap has been an unpleasant interruption to my hibernation. Days are getting longer & hopefully soon warmer!
The list of friends that send me mails I should forward is getting longer, thank you all, sorry they don’t all get immediate retransmission the way the used to! For a long time I’ve been praying for friends who send & receive mails & recently some mails have been on that theme. All prayers appreciated for me to give up smoking & have better relationships with my kids.
Love & blessings to all
Malcolm X
(220 views)Dearest Friends, After several months, coming round to Absolute bit by bit, many comment on my absent jokes. Sorry I’ve not received many, nor looked for them. Just a few text messages I’ve received, others may have seen? A nurse walks into a bank totally exhausted after a 20 hour shift. Preparing to write a cheque, she pulls a rectal thermometer out of her purse & tries to write with it. She looks at the flabbergasted cashier & without missing a beat says; ”Well that’s great! That’s real great! Some arsole’s got my pen! A Jewish boy is born with no eyelids! Doctors say they can operate using old foreskins but his mother is worried it will make him cock-eyed! When asked if I preferred legs or breasts I told her that I had a particular fondness for smooth fannies. She then told me that that wasn’t an option when choosing a KFC bargain bucket! I’ve just seen a dog in the garden shagging a cabbage! Silly bastad must’ve thought it was a collie! 2 honeymooning ducks in a hotel realise they forgot condoms!I’ll call room service & he asks the receptionist for some. She says OK sir, do you want me to put them on your bill?No you daft twat! I’ll suffocate! God bless Malcolm X
(280 views)An old hillbilly farmer had a wife who nagged him unmercifully. From morning till night (and sometimes later), she was always complaining about something. The only time he got any relief was when he was out plowing with his old mule. He tried to plow a lot.
One day, when he was out plowing, his wife brought him lunch in the field. He drove the old mule into the shade, sat down on a stump, and began to eat his lunch.Immediately, his wife began haranguing him again. Complain, nag, nag; it just went on and on.All of a sudden, the old mule lashed out with both hind feet; caught her smack in the back of the head. Killed her dead on the spot.At the funeral several days later, the minister noticed something rather odd. When a woman mourner would approach the old farmer, he would listen for a minute, then nod his head in agreement; but when a man mourner approached him, he would listen for a minute, then shake his head in disagreement. This was so consistent, the minister decided to ask the old farmer about it. So after the funeral, the minister spoke to the old farmer, and asked him why he nodded his head and agreed with the women, but always shook his head and disagreed with all the men.
The old farmer said: "Well, the women would come up and say something about how nice my wife looked, or how pretty her dress was, so I'd nod my head in agreement." "And what about the men?" the minister asked.
"They wanted to know if the mule was for sale."
(275 views)A woman pregnant with triplets was walking down the street when a masked robber ran out of a bank and shot her three times in the stomach. Luckily the babies were OK. The surgeon decided to leave the bullets in because it was too risky to operate. She gave birth to two healthy daughters and a healthy son.
All was fine for 16 years, and then one daughter walked into the room in tears.
'What's wrong?' asked the mother. 'I was taking a tinkle and this bullet came out,' replied the daughter.
The mother told her it was okay and explained what happened 16 years ago.
About a week later the second daughter walked into the room in tears. 'Mom, I was taking a tinkle and this bullet ! came out.'
Again the mother told her not to worry and explained what happened 16 years ago.
A week later her son walked into the room in tears. 'It's okay' said the Mom, 'I know what happened You were taking a tinkle and a bullet came out.'
'No,' said the boy, 'I was playing with myself and I shot the dog.'
(190 views)A sweet grandmother telephoned University Community Hospital. She timidly asked, "Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is doing?"
The operator said, "I'll be glad to help, dear. What's the name and room
number?"
The grandmother in her weak tremulous voice said, "Betty Miller", Room 302."
The operator replied, "Let me place you on hold while I check with her
nurse."
After a few minutes the operator returned to the phone and said, "Good news.
Her nurse has told me that Betty is doing very well. Her blood pressure is fine. Her blood work just came back as normal and her Physician, Dr. Garcia, has scheduled her to be discharged Tuesday."
The grandmother said, "Thank you. That's wonderful! I was so worried! God Bless you for the good news."
The operator replied, "You're more than welcome. Is Betty your daughter?"
The Grandmother said, "No, I'm Betty in 302. No one tells me shit." (214 views) How do you embarrass an archaeologist?
Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.
Why don't blind people skydive?
It scares the sh*t out of the dog.
Why was the washing machine laughing?
Because it was taking the piss out of the undies.
What's the definition of a Yankee?
Same thing as a "quickie", only you do it yourself.
What is the definition of Confidence?
When your wife catches you in bed with another woman and you slap her on the ass and say, "You're next!"
What do you get if you cross a pit bull with a hooker?
Your last blow job.
Irish ~Jokes
Where do you find an Irish woodworm?
Dead inside a brick.
How do know if a fish is Irish?
It has drowned.
How do you get an Irishman to burn his ear?
Ring him up while he is ironing.
How do you keep an Irishman busy?
Write P.T.O on both sides of a piece of paper.
How do you spot an Irishman at a carwash?
He's the one on the bike.
How do you sink an Irish Submarine?
Knock on the hatch.
An Irish man walked around the world...
He drowned.
How do you confuse an Irishman?
Put him in a round room and tell him to sit in the corner
How many Irishmen does it take to change a lightbulb?
2001. One to hold the bulb and 2000 to turn the house round!! (219 views)Dear Friends,When I got a text from my daughter saying she’d accepted proposition of marriage with Arnaud, I thought she implied that it would be this year. Wrong! They’ll think about it during summer hols, either next year or 2010!At least, that makes it more difficult for the mum of Rebecca & Nathan to deprive them seeing their ½ sister get married. That means I’ll be able to see them in decent conditions, even if their mum only lets them stay 1 day, I’ll probably shed tears, starting with joy being with ALL my kids for a short moment is worth any pain physically travelling or emotion when time to say “Goodbye.”Who knows what tomorrow holds? Suddenly I have something to look forward to. Thanks to all who prayed.With sincere affection to allMalcolm X (296 views)Hi folks! I'm rather excited at the prospect of seeing The Moody Blues in The Royal Albert Hall Oct 7th. When I booked the tickets, asking about disabled access, I was told I was entitled to a FREE ticket for the person accompanying me! £33 + 3.50 booking & Free £33 ticket!
Friend likes Moody Blues but doesn't drive, thinking of sharing a taxi (yes, from Essex!)
Main thing is that other disabled people might be able to get there with a little help from a friend!
1st 45rpm I bought was "Go Now!" Loved them ever since! Their songs express most of the emotions I've experienced & in many ways tell my life story!
Tags: Moody Blues
« previous 1 2 3 4 ...
85 next »