HelenMW blog on Absolute Radio

3D glasses

HelenMW — Tue, 31 Mar 2009 11:35:00 +0100

I was a bit surprised to get a letter from Island records this morning and even more baffled when I opened the envelope to see that all it contained was a pair of 3D glasses!

But when I took them out and saw the word Keane printed on the front I remembered entering a competition last week for a Keane gig that would be broadcast in 3D. I've just given them a trial run on the gig page http://www.absoluteradio.co.uk/music/artists/keane/article/3629.html and I'm really impressed!

I'll definitely have to tune in on Thursday for the webcast, did any other VIPs get a pair?

Sonisphere

HelenMW — Wed, 25 Feb 2009 19:17:00 +0000

I only heard about this the other day but its a bit like Download but nearer to London. Here's the link to the website http://www.sonispherefestivals.com/uk/lineup are any of you wonderful VIPs going?

Something you don't see everyday!

HelenMW — Fri, 23 Jan 2009 18:22:00 +0000

Yes, it's a man with a huge teddy bear on the London Underground!

It gave all us other passengers something to smile about on our dreary commute!

Golf

HelenMW — Tue, 20 Jan 2009 12:21:00 +0000

A husband takes his wife to play her first game of golf, unfortunately, the wife promptly whacked her first shot right through the window of the biggest house adjacent to the course. The husband cringed, 'I warned you to be careful! Now we'll have to go up there, find the owner, apologize and see how much your lousy drive is going to cost us.’ So the couple walked up to the house and knocked on the door. A warm voice said, 'Come on in.' when they opened the door they saw the damage that was done: glass was all over the place, and a broken antique bottle was lying on its side near the broken window. A man reclining on the couch asked, 'are you the people that broke my window?’ 'Uh...yeah, sir. We're really sorry about that,' the husband replied. 'Oh, no apology is necessary. Actually I want to thank you... You see, I'm a genie, and I've been trapped in that bottle for a thousand years. Now that you've released me, I'm allowed to grant three wishes. I'll give you each one wish, but if you don't mind, I'll keep the last one for myself.’ 'Wow, that's great!' the husband said. He pondered a moment and blurted out, 'I'd like a million dollars a year for the rest of my life.’ 'No problem,' said the genie 'you’ve got it, it's the least I can do. And I'll guarantee you a long, healthy life!' 'And now you, young lady, what do you want?' the genie asked. 'I'd like to own a gorgeous home complete with servants in every country in the world,' she said. 'Consider it done,' the genie said. 'And your homes will always be safe from fire, burglary and natural disasters!’ 'And now,' the couple asked in unison, what's your wish, genie?’ 'Well, since I've been trapped in that bottle and haven't been with a woman in more than a thousand years, my wish is to have sex with your wife.’ The husband looked at his wife and said, 'Gee, honey, you know we both now have a fortune, and all those houses. What do you think?’ She mulled it over for a few moments and said, 'You know, you're right. Considering our good fortune, I guess I wouldn't mind, but what about you, honey?’ 'You know I love you sweetheart,' said the husband. I'd do the same for you!'

So the genie and the woman went upstairs where they spent the rest of the afternoon enjoying each other in every way. After about three hours of non-stop sex, the genie rolled over and looked directly into her eyes and asked, 'how old are you and your husband?’ 'Why, we're both 35,' she responded breathlessly. ‘No S**t.' He said, 'Thirty-five years old and you both still believe in genies?'

Just gotta tell you this!

HelenMW — Wed, 24 Dec 2008 08:51:00 +0000

Further to my earlier post about the Madness concert at the O2 last Friday http://www.absoluteradio.co.uk/vip/profile/HelenMW/blog/99564/Madness_at_Madness_at_the_O2.html

I was listening to Madstock this morning and I remembered that the song they were playing at the height of the big fight was 'It must be love' - how funny is that!

Even as we were standing there looking on in horror we couldn't help but remark on the irony of the situation!

Well, have a great Crimbo everyone! XOXO

Madness at Madness at the O2

HelenMW — Sat, 20 Dec 2008 14:43:00 +0000

Last night I went to see the nutty boys at the O2 and I have to say they were excellent! They played a mix of old favourites and tracks from their forthcoming album and put on a fabulous show.

Towards the end of the evening they launched into a trio of their best loved songs, House of Fun, Baggy Trousers and Our House. Everyone was having a great time until a man on the row behind me fell over and landed on the row in front of me.

What happened next was unbeliveable, for no reason at all men in the vicinity of where he landed started punching him and each other! And more were joining in by the second and jumping up and down rows to get stuck in.

This all happened right next to where I was standing and it was scary because for a while it looked as if a riot was going to break out but luckily people in the crowd were able to control the situation - which was just as well because there were no security guards to be seen anywhere.

An uneasy peace broke out but a lot of people decided it was time to go including everyone to my left which included the young girl who the man had fallen over and her parents. The poor girl was traumatised.

Those of us who stayed wondered where the hell the security staff were and if they would arrive before it all kicked off again because there was a lot of threats being shouted.

Eventually some arrived but they were worse than useless and another fight broke out, again right next to me, this time however some proper security guards came and all of the protagonists were removed leaving a lot of empty seats and an audince who had lost their appetite for fun.

By the time I looked back at the stage Suggs was saying goodnight and I was feeling short changed for missing what to me were the highlights of the show.

We stayed for the first encore but the atmosphere was gone and we couldn't really enjoy ourselves anymore so we and a lot of others around us left before they came back out for the second encore.

As we left the arena it was somewhat gratifying to see some of the worst offenders being interviewed by the police but I felt very disappointed as I heard the opening bars of Night Boat to Cairo playing as I went down the escalator.

All in all it was a great gig ruined by idiots.

AAAAAAARGHHHHH!!!

HelenMW — Sat, 20 Dec 2008 14:08:00 +0000

I have a fabulous new pic for my avatar, It's Valentino Rossi dressed as Santa and I thought it would loook great for Christmas, but......I can't upload it because this site keeps on teeling me it is too small and needs to be more than 200 pixels - despite the fact that it is 403 x 572!!!

Has anyone else had probs with their avatar?

Fall Out Boy

HelenMW — Sat, 06 Dec 2008 09:09:00 +0000

WooHoo! Just got my tickets to see Fall Out Boy at the O2 in March - Yay!

Is anyone else going?

Thank you!

HelenMW — Sun, 16 Nov 2008 16:30:00 +0000

Firstly, thank you to Kaz for blogging it and secondly thank you to everyone who came to my page to wish me a happy birthday.

I'm currently in Ireland nursing a hangover after my party last night so I won't thank you all individually cos the jarring of my fingers on the keyboard is making me feel nauseous.....lol!

I'll catch up with you all when I'm feeling a bit perkier

Quotes - some wise, some funny

HelenMW — Tue, 21 Oct 2008 17:31:00 +0100

Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself 'Lillian, you should have remained a virgin.' - Lillian Carter (mother of Jimmy Carter)

I had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalogue: 'No good in a bed, but fine against a wall.' - Eleanor Roosevelt

Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister, and now wish to withdraw that statement - Mark Twain

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year - Victor Borge

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint - Mark Twain

By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher - Socrates

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury - Groucho Marx

My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe - Jimmy Durante

I have never hated a man enough to give his diamonds back - Zsa Zsa Gabor

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat - Alex Levine

My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying - Rodney Dangerfield

Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery - Spike Milligan

Until I was thirteen, I thought my name was SHUT UP - Joe Namath

I don't feel old. I don't feel anything until noon. Then it's time for my nap - Bob Hope

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress - Will Rogers

Don't worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older, it will avoid you - Winston Churchill

By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he's too old to go anywhere - Billy Crystal

Does anyone else........

HelenMW — Mon, 20 Oct 2008 12:19:00 +0100

.......think that Russ Williams looks like Julian Clary in the pic shown at the top of this page when he's on air?

Here's a pic of Julian for those of you who don't know who he is.......

I'm walking on sunshine!!

HelenMW — Sun, 28 Sep 2008 17:41:00 +0100

Well, it's been a long hard summer but my man finally did what I've been wishing for for two long years now and retook the motoGP world championship - WOOHOO!!

It was totally worth getting up at 5.30 this morning to watch him clinch the title and win the race live from Japan

Valentino Rossi - best rider EVER!!!!

Me so happy I just had to share!! :-D

VR's loss is YC's gain.....missing me already?...LOL

HelenMW — Thu, 05 Jun 2008 12:05:00 +0100

Fellow Vipers, as those of you who've been around a while will know, I don't spend much time on here these days.

I used to be on here for at least a couple of hours every day and it was all good fun but things have changed and I feel it's time to move on....

The main reason for this is not that we have lost so many good people since the beginning of the year thanks to bitter infighting, but that is a factor.

Neither is it because the site is so blooming slow and dysfunctional sometimes that it would try the patience of a saint, but again this is a factor.

Nor is it because now that I am working full-time again I just haven't got the time, which is a very big factor.

No the main reason I'm going is because this site just isn't as good as it used to be.......LOL! Watch Vipers all over the world explode!!

No, no, I'm joking, I just couldn't resist saying that....

hehehe......

Actually I'm going because of all three serious reason plus the fact that these days when I do manage to find some time to surf I invariably find myself on Valentino Rossi's fanclub forum - the yellow community. It's a forum in the true sense of the word and offers all the functionality of a forum unlike this place, which works okay but lacks a lot, as we've pointed out again and again.

So, fellow Vipers, it's been great, I've met some wonderful people on here and made some great friends, and I'll miss you all.

I will drop by occasionally as the mood takes me but I am really only keeping my account open so that I can enter competitions so please consider me gone.

Bye bye kiddies, be good......

Sunburn!

HelenMW — Sun, 25 May 2008 20:34:00 +0100

I spent most of last week wondering what the weather would be like this weekend, so I was delighted to find the sun shining in my part of the world this afternoon......

Problem is, I decided it would be a nice day to go for a ride on my bike (pedal) so off I went 'sans' suntan lotion and guess what......

Yep, now I'm burnt, and to make it worse, I was wearing riding gloves so I have red arms and white hands, and yes it looks as bad as it sounds!!!

Anyone else do something stupid?

I'm really confused.....

HelenMW — Mon, 19 May 2008 12:55:00 +0100

Okay, I know that there has been a lot of stuff said here about Sandra Morgan and I really don't want to stoke up any fires but my brain is going into a cramp trying to work this out.

Did MG and V4mpire really never meet till last weekend??? I find that very difficult to believe, I thought they had been going out for months and months and I thought that they had met at a nightclub.

Can someone enlighten me please?