Day_Dreaming blog on Absolute Radio

A little extra

Day_Dreaming — Fri, 10 Aug 2007 16:30:00 +0100

Read 8 little words first then read this its kinda supposed to be that way round.....

He said . . . I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
She said . . . You wear pants don't you?

He said . . ..... Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said . That's a good idea - you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart!

He said . ... What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
She said . .....Turn sideways and look in the mirror!
He said . . ..... Why don't you tell me when you have an orgasm?
She said . . .. I would but you're never there.

He said . ..... Why don't women blink during foreplay?
She said . . They don't have time

He said . . How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
She said . . We don't know; it has never happened.

He said . . Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and Good- looking?
She said ...... . . They already have boyfriends.

She said...What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
He said . . . A widow.

He said . .. . Why are married women heavier than single women?
She said . . . Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.

Love

.Xxo.

8 LIttle Words

Day_Dreaming — Fri, 10 Aug 2007 16:29:00 +0100

1. THINGY (thing-ee) n.
Female...... Any part under a car's hood.
Male..... The strap fastener on a woman's bra.

2. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
Female.... Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
Male.... Playing cricket without a box.

3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.
Female... The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
Male... Leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with the boys.

4. COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n.
Female.... A desire to get married and raise a family.
Male...... Trying not to hit on other women while out with this one.

5. ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.
Female.... A good movie, concert, play or book.
Male...... Anything that can be done while drinking beer.

6. FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n.
Female.... An embarrassing by product of indigestion.
Male...... A source of entertainment, self-expression, male bonding.

7 MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n.
Female...... The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
Male.. Call it whatever you want, just as long as we do it.

8. REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.
Female.... A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
Male... A device for scanning through all 375 channels every 5 minutes.

St.Peter(another joke)

Day_Dreaming — Sat, 04 Aug 2007 15:18:00 +0100

3 men came towards the gates of heaven and when they got there St.Peter told them to stop

"Look heaven's getting a bit full so im going to have to ask you how you died and then i'll decide if you can go in."

The first guy steps up.

"Well i thought my wife was having an affair for a while and when i came home that day and saw her in her black silky bathrobe i knew it was true.I started storming round searching our appartment for the guy when i went out to the balcony and saw these fingers hanging off it and i knew that was the guy.I trampled on his fingers until he fell off into the bushes below.But just to make sure he wouldnt bother my wife again i threw the fridge over.I then had a heart attack and died."

St Peter nodded his head and let him in.The second guy walked up and said

"Well i was playing with my dog on my balcony when i accidentally fell over the top.However i managed to grab hold of the balcony below when some deranged idiot started stamping on my fingers.I had to let go but landed in the bushes below which was thankful and i only had a few broken bones.Then this fridge landed on top of me."

St Peter nodded his head and let him in.The third man walked up and said

"Well i was in this fridge........."

.Xxo.

Newsreal

Day_Dreaming — Sun, 29 Jul 2007 20:57:00 +0100

A man is sitting watching the news in a pub. On it is a story about a guy on top of a viaduct.There are police trying to persuade him not to jump.The man turns to the blonde sitting next to him and says "bet you 25 quid he jumps" and the blonde says alright.The carry on watching and sure enough the guy jumps.The man turns to the blonde again and says "sorry that wasnt very fair i'd already seen the news and knew he was going to jump"

The blonde turns to him and says"so did i but i didnt think he'd do it twice"

.Xxo.

The return of

Day_Dreaming — Sat, 28 Jul 2007 16:44:00 +0100

Excellent KT Tunstall is back with an awesome song to follow up from her previously awesome album.If you didnt hear it on virgin i have added a youtube URL so you too can enjoy this song!!!

Enjoy

ttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BCDtJmOBj4g

.Xxo.

Live music

Day_Dreaming — Tue, 24 Jul 2007 10:41:00 +0100

Did anyone hear Amy Mcdonald with Ben Jones last night?Love to go and see her live now that session was seriously awesome!

.Xxo.

Feeling hot hot hot

Day_Dreaming — Fri, 20 Jul 2007 10:27:00 +0100

It's supposed to be the 20th of July for jesus sakes not 20th of november!What happened to the lovely weather of yesterday??I nearly burned cause it was so hot and now look at what we've got!grrrrrr .Xxo.

Check these guys out

Day_Dreaming — Sun, 03 Jun 2007 15:27:00 +0100

If you havent already follow this link to a group on myspace and listen to these guys cause they are amazing.Listen to Underwater cause it's beautiful

http://www.myspace.com/verticalhorizon

.Xxo.

Seth Lakeman Live

Day_Dreaming — Thu, 31 May 2007 15:17:00 +0100

wow.Saw Seth Lakeman at the Hay festival on friday and he was amazing. Not only is he one of the best looking singer-songwriters around he is an incredible musician. And he sounds better live than he does on the CD and thats saying something.

Actually it was kinda weird cause he actually sounded more rock than anything which was pretty cool and...........i met him!! oh yeh very cool and he had a very cool pair of boots and now im starting to waffle so im going to shut up!

So if any of you have the chance to

GO SEE SETH LAKEMAN!!!!!

.Xxo.