Pun Street
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The first proposal this week came via Alderman White. It's an Off Licence with the name The Grogfather. The committee - who consider Pun Street - severely lacking in alcohol provision were only too happy to approve.
Alderwoman Ward brought forward two alternative suggestions for a pet shop: Tyrannosaurus Pets and Heavy Petting. Alderman White objected to the name Heavy Petting on grounds of taste and decency suggesting the term shouldn't be used in any context relating to people's actual pets. His argument was considered very persuasive and the name Heavy Petting was rejected. However, Tyrannosaurus Pets met with unanimous approval. Permission granted.
The committee then turned their attention to the side streets connecting to Pun Street. As you're no doubt aware, from the inception of Pun Street work began on a small lane where pun free businesses could be sited if their name was considered sufficiently charming. This lane - which before today contained only two shops (the antique dealers, Your Aunty Used To Have One But She Threw It Away and the hairdressers, It'll Grow Back) was unnamed but from today will take the name Charming Alley. The Chairman felt able to recommend extending Charming Alley to accommodate a proposal sent in by Apple Teeth, namely a gay bar - originally spotted in Bath - with the name Does Your Mother Know? The committee could find no objections and added that the house rule of providing a free drink for anyone who brings their mother only made it all the more charming. Permission granted.
Finally, a number of people have been in touch to tell us of shops with names so awful as to be worthy of celebration.
In light of this, the earth has been cut and a new thoroughfare created with the name Fail Lane. The first establishment opened on Fail Lane was proposed by Alan from Glasgow who tells of a Chinese Restaurant in that city by the name of Swiss Cottage. Permission granted - there's now another one on Fail Lane.
The only-one-business-of-a-given-kind rule does not apply on Fail Lane - they don't deserve to operate a monopoly - and so another Chinese restaurant was also granted immediate permission and will be sited next door. This was came direct from the chairman who had received a leaflet through his front door recommending a real life example only a few days earlier. This second Fail Lane Chinese restaurant is called The Roman Empire.
The third establishment opened on Fail Lane was brought to the committee by Alderman White having been brought to his attention by Nick of Leighton Buzzard. It is a Pound Shop with the I'm-mad-me! name, Crazy Madness.
Debate raged over whether or not a second suggestion from Nick deserved to be on Fail Lane or Charming Alley. Or indeed neither. It is a bakery of Japanese origins called Miss Elizabeth Muffin. Is it deliberately charming or a fail on the translation front? In the end no decision was reached and the public are invited to offer their opinions.
Finally, one more establishment was fast-tracked on to Fail Lane. It's a toy shop - mention of which was in part responsible for starting the whole discussion that led to the founding of Pun Street no less. It is, of course, Much Ado About Toys.
There were many more suggestions but the committee only has so much time so they resolved to consider more next week. New submissions are welcomed in the comments section below or by e-mail.
Week 9 Pun Street Planning Committee
WEEK 9 PUN STREET PLANNING COMMITTEE NOTES:The first proposal this week came via Alderman White. It's an Off Licence with the name The Grogfather. The committee - who consider Pun Street - severely lacking in alcohol provision were only too happy to approve.
Alderwoman Ward brought forward two alternative suggestions for a pet shop: Tyrannosaurus Pets and Heavy Petting. Alderman White objected to the name Heavy Petting on grounds of taste and decency suggesting the term shouldn't be used in any context relating to people's actual pets. His argument was considered very persuasive and the name Heavy Petting was rejected. However, Tyrannosaurus Pets met with unanimous approval. Permission granted.
The committee then turned their attention to the side streets connecting to Pun Street. As you're no doubt aware, from the inception of Pun Street work began on a small lane where pun free businesses could be sited if their name was considered sufficiently charming. This lane - which before today contained only two shops (the antique dealers, Your Aunty Used To Have One But She Threw It Away and the hairdressers, It'll Grow Back) was unnamed but from today will take the name Charming Alley. The Chairman felt able to recommend extending Charming Alley to accommodate a proposal sent in by Apple Teeth, namely a gay bar - originally spotted in Bath - with the name Does Your Mother Know? The committee could find no objections and added that the house rule of providing a free drink for anyone who brings their mother only made it all the more charming. Permission granted.
Finally, a number of people have been in touch to tell us of shops with names so awful as to be worthy of celebration.
In light of this, the earth has been cut and a new thoroughfare created with the name Fail Lane. The first establishment opened on Fail Lane was proposed by Alan from Glasgow who tells of a Chinese Restaurant in that city by the name of Swiss Cottage. Permission granted - there's now another one on Fail Lane.
The only-one-business-of-a-given-kind rule does not apply on Fail Lane - they don't deserve to operate a monopoly - and so another Chinese restaurant was also granted immediate permission and will be sited next door. This was came direct from the chairman who had received a leaflet through his front door recommending a real life example only a few days earlier. This second Fail Lane Chinese restaurant is called The Roman Empire.
The third establishment opened on Fail Lane was brought to the committee by Alderman White having been brought to his attention by Nick of Leighton Buzzard. It is a Pound Shop with the I'm-mad-me! name, Crazy Madness.
Debate raged over whether or not a second suggestion from Nick deserved to be on Fail Lane or Charming Alley. Or indeed neither. It is a bakery of Japanese origins called Miss Elizabeth Muffin. Is it deliberately charming or a fail on the translation front? In the end no decision was reached and the public are invited to offer their opinions.
Finally, one more establishment was fast-tracked on to Fail Lane. It's a toy shop - mention of which was in part responsible for starting the whole discussion that led to the founding of Pun Street no less. It is, of course, Much Ado About Toys.
There were many more suggestions but the committee only has so much time so they resolved to consider more next week. New submissions are welcomed in the comments section below or by e-mail.
